October 17, 2021
New and expectant moms very often suffer from depression and anxiety. The challenges faced during the pandemic have compounded this even more.
There are several factors affecting a mom’s mental health…
Firstly, family members and friends very often show more concern for a pregnant mum, asking whether they’ve been eating enough, taking rest, and regularly attending their healthcare appointments.
When the baby is born, a mom’s health becomes secondary to their newborn baby’s health, especially since the world is aware that the first few months in a baby’s life are the most sensitive. Throughout the pandemic, moms have faced an added emotional burden of fear and anxiety in terms of trying to protect themselves and their babies from Covid.
This very quick shift from being the focus of attention and the excitement of welcoming baby to the reality of what comes with looking after baby can be extremely tough. The changes in mom’s body, the lack of sleep and the change in hormones can be difficult to deal with and this this can cause loneliness and frustration, a loss of interest in the things they loved to do at some point and an identity crisis.
And then there’s the guilt and the supermom complex that moms do not even have the time to think about and internalize because of the hustle-bustle of pregnancy and then the primary caregiving of the newborn.
Through all this, there is the potential of reaching burnout which moms of course, want to avoid which means that you must look after your mental health thoroughly, throughout this period especially.
We need you to remember that you’re not a bad mom when you think about yourself occasionally and even more so that you need to look after your mental well-being. Happier mums give better care to their newborns.
Before we dive into the problems and solutions for mothering, the disclaimer is that if you face symptoms of clinical post-partum and prenatal depression, please seek professional support from a certified therapist.
Top Challenges Busy Moms Face and How They Can be Dealt with:
Society, your friends and your family mediate and fixate on perceived flaws in your mothering. Your love for your child makes you second-guess, regret and face guilt in accordance with what you feel you should be doing and whether you should be doing more. This is one of the main factors causing anxiety and can result in depression.
How can you deal with this?
Find a mom’s group. No one understands the initial stages of motherhood better than the next pregnant/new mom. You’ll find that you relate to almost all the issues discussed by the other moms in your group, resulting in reduced feelings of self-doubt and guilt. You’ll be reminded of the fact that you’re not alone.
Looking after the household and work-related responsibilities when you’re already exhausted and emotionally unavailable due to pregnancy or looking after your newborn is the recipe for a period of burnout. In most cases, you feel as though you have no choice. Giving attention to your partner can seem tiresome too.
How can you deal with this?
Baby steps (pun intended).
AKA set smaller goals for yourself. You don’t have to complete all your household chores alone or all at once- leave some for your hubby and if you want, do them together and talk about how you’re feeling.
If you must do laundry, wash dishes or work, start with the smaller tasks. If you feel like you can do more, do more. Don’t push yourself to the point of burnout.
If you find yourself scrolling through social media often in a day, you’re also likely to be following mom influencers. Celebrity mom bodies are posted minus the stretch marks and pregnancy weight gain, making you question your self-worth. The worst is when your friends and family comment on your baby weight gain.
How can you deal with this?
Get off social media for a bit or spend less time on it. As you are probably already well aware, the media can be misleading, and the celebrity moms you see on it may conceal many of their issues. Having stretch marks and gaining weight is normal.
There are PLENTY of mom pages with REAL images from pregnancy that speak about the real issues all moms face.
You can also refocus your time on rest and recovery or picking up a hobby.
“But I can’t- “
“But I need to. “
“What if my baby- “
You have probably prepared a list of reasons why you can’t take time out to do something you enjoy for a while or to pamper yourself.
How can you deal with this?
First, you must remember that you’re not being advised to spend long hours, every day, every week, taking time for yourself. Try taking one moment a day. Watch your favourite movie, get your hair done, read a book or nap.
Pro tip: If your friends or family are unavailable to look after your little one, especially when you need urgent me-time, we’re here for you!
Our certified nurses will provide the best care for your little one.
Book our Newborn Care experts using this Link.
A few extra stress-relievers suggested by new mums themselves:
Journaling about your negative thoughts helps reveal thinking patterns. Once you realize where your negativity stems from, you can shift your thoughts to more positive ones.
Finding something new that interests you helps you realize you’re moving on, and you end up feeling proud of yourself again.
Exercise may not always leave you feeling exhausted. The activity requires attention, focus and patience, resulting in you feeling refreshed and fulfilled since you’re able to focus on something other than parenting.
Healthy eating helps you feel energized and less tired. It also makes you feel good about yourself! Substitute those gluten-heavy comfort foods with nutritious and yummy vegetables.
Some days are great mom days, making you feel good about your new sets of parenting skills. For those not-so-great days, positive affirmations help. It involves showing yourself compassion and understanding.
Repeat after us:
“I am a great mom. I’m doing my very best, and it’s enough! I am blessed to have my beautiful baby, whom I love very much.”
Repeating these words will help you believe them.
If you’re likely to forget saying this mantra to yourself, write it down in a note and stick it up on your refrigerator, computer screen or bathroom mirror.
Every mom excels in different areas of motherhood. Every baby has different periods for developmental milestones. Knowing this keeps you from self-doubt.
Lastly, try appreciating this phase for as long as it lasts. Your baby will become a toddler, and then a preteen, and then a teenager. Whether you believe it or not right now, you’re going to miss these baby moments!
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